Merlot meets Sara

Four titans and ten epicly geared heroes versus some old bird in a dress: this'll be a cake walk. Shield tank, frisbee, penance blah blah. Seriously, what god looks like Anne Robinson? No respect. That reminds me of that episode of Doctor Who when... oh bugger, move from green cloud. Move, move... phew. So yea, the old bird's going down like a sack of spanners. Wonder what she'll drop? I only need three more badges for my... WHOA where the hell did THAT come from? OK OK, we can do this. Nearly full mana bar. Shield tank, frisbee. That is one UGLY tentacle. She'd seriously better not put that thing anywhere near me... DO not... I said do NOT... omg she DID. I feel violated. This bitch is going down. Shield tank, frisbee, penance... penance? Why am I not shooting gold sparks? Oh, not enough mana. That can't be right. How the... omg, I have NO mana. It just VANISHED. OK, don't panic. Cast shadowfiend. Wait, no, use hymn. OK, channelling n... omg, feared. We're screwed. Why am I RUNNING? OK, it's OK. Drop a pot, stay calm. Shit, sanity is super low, better just jump in this nice green light thingy... great, feared. Breathe, breathe. OK, shield tank, frisbee, run back to green thingy... 70, 80, 90... Thank you Freya :) Hmm, is someone shouting at me? Why would someone be shouting at me? What does that red beam do? Why is my health dropping? Can we bring the old lady back now please?

A rare occurence

I'm not cutting edge, not what you'd call an 'early adopter', so the last place I expected to find myself tonight was in 10-man Crusaders' Colliseum; I still haven't finished Ulduar. Healing as well, can you believe it?

I think it will be quite fun when I get over the shock and horror. Among the beasts encounter, only the worms are a real challenge. Positioning is very difficult, particularly as a healer with a need to stay in range of both tanks while avoiding frontal cone attacks and moving around to dispel the poison. If the worms die, you've won.

The second guy, released yesterday, is a demon that throws just about every conceivable evil shit at the lot of you: chain lightning, dots, fires, adds, even volcanoes. This is another fight where staying out of trouble and keeping in range of everyone to heal them is the biggest challenge. The add tank died on a couple of occasions because I just wasn't standing in the right place at the right time. But we got him down on our fourth attempt, which ain't bad for me :)

Interestingly, we took two tanks and four healers into the instance. I've never tackled a 10-man with more than three before, and often only two. I don't know if this is how other guilds are doing it, but it was a good move on our part. The whole raid takes significant damage throughout both encounters and with range being the issue it is I think we would have struggled a lot more just keeping everyone up.

Washed-up priest walks out on Argent contest

The Argent Tournament grounds were plunged into turmoil yesterday when a blood elf threw down his lance and refused to joust.

The pouting priest accused the faction champions of being "stoopid" and "bugged to all hell" before skulking out of the arena in search of kittens to kick.

A tournament squire gleefully recounted the priest's final fateful joust:

"He looked just like all the other champions when he mounted the turkey. He strutted over to the draenei and slapped one across the face. Bit girly I thought, but I've seen worse. But man, I don't know what he thought he was doing after that. I saw him toss a couple of shield breakers, but the draenei dude always got the first charge in. Half the time, the priest was facing the wrong way."

"I think he's a key turner," another observer whispered.

The priest, known to locals as Merlot, was eventually tracked down to Dalaran's Filthy Animal, where he was seen singing bawdy verses and flirting with the orc bouncers.

"They're all cheats," he blurted in-between hiccups. "They don't lag, they don't need to shield break and they're always facing the right way. S'not natural."

The mention of cheating drew jeers from some of the inn's more burly patrons. A half-masticated drumstick hit the priest square on the jaw spinning him round.

"S'not right," he slurred. "I's a mace felter not a lapadin. Where's the magic turna... tour... ment thingy huh?"

He passed out, leaving the unanswered question hanging in the air.

Horde bookmakers have since raises their odds on the priest ever completing the tournament quest line.

WTB that spell

So I'm happily questing around Scourgeholme in Ice Crown, not really paying much attention to what I'm doing. There are some skeletons and some insects and a couple of things that look a bit like that boss at the end of Arcatraz that does that mega mind flay. And suddenly it's casting mind sear on me and I think 'haha, even the npcs don't know how to use it properly'. And then I notice it's doing damage. To me. The target. It's alright for some.

I need more fingers

I'm having trouble with a quest in Zul'Drak.

Betrayal is the climax of an epic quest line that starts innocently enough with a caged troll in Grizzly Hills. This is our first encounter with a chap called Drakuru.

Like many of his race, he appears a little savage at first, particularly to the refined tastes of a blood elf, but he implies he has important information about the Scourge. And so we are drawn into a blood pact which leads us on quests all over Grizzly Hills and eventually to Drak'Tharon, where Drakuru's true agenda is revealed.

We encounter him again under very different circumstances in Zul'Drak, where we are guided by the Ebon Watch on a series of quests that lead up to Betrayal.

I hope that doesn't give too much away for anyone yet to get this far. It's a lot of fun to watch the story unfold as you trundle along through the quests.

But this particular quest has been a bit of shock to the system.

You are required to take control of a pet to attack your target but the pet is almost certainly not going to survive the full encounter. You have to take control of a second pet mid-way through. The pet has several actions and spells that you need to mash at every cooldown to beat down your target. At the same time, there is a lot of heavy aoe that you need to avoid, requiring pretty constant movement. The pet has a heal spell which targets you, but it won't out-heal the aoe. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be attacking the target myself at this point. Clearly, it's the logical thing to do, but I'm finding it hard to focus on my pet specials at the same time and keep out of the aoe, not to mention timing when you take control of your replacement pet seems to be crucial. Ergo: I need more fingers.

I can't think of any other quest in the game that has given me so much trouble. It's almost as if it requires... skill! Could this be the prototype of a new World of Warcraft, where you actually need to learn to play to progress? Am I going to have to get good to move on? Are my days of questing on auto-pilot while gabbing in chat over?

Or is this another one of those quests where I'm being hideously dim and don't deserve to complete it?