8 September 2008

Critters up in arms at spell hit changes

Azeroth's menagerie of critters was in uproar this week as Blizzard confirmed its intention to remove the 1% miss chance for spells.

Currently all targets, regardless of level, have a small innate chance to resist magical spells and effects. If Blizzard's intended change goes ahead, the World of Warcraft's legion of marauding magicians will be able to achieve a spell hit chance of 100% through talents and gear.

It's the last straw for the critters, who claim a systematic attempt to wipe them out.

"This change will spell certain doom for critters everywhere," said Skunk, a resident of Terokkar Forest.

"For years we have added interest and variety to the landscape of Azeroth, in the face of extreme danger.

"Yet we are terrorised daily by marauding adventurers, chased by beasts, even fried by non-combat pets.

"Our only hope of escape from AOE and malicious pranksters is that slim chance to resist. It's not a lot, it's not something to bank your future on, but it saved my fur once and it's all we have. Without it, I fear this could mean the complete extermination of critter life on Azeroth."

"It's alright for the cute ones," complained one Karazhan rat who asked not to be named for fear of reprisals. "But who wants a rat running around the place? We've got no chance now. I should have rolled a bunny."

While this plan came to light in an mmo champion report, the full story behind changes to hit mechanics remain shrouded in mystery. The changes are expected to come into effect with the next, as yet unscheduled, patch.

Blizzard declined to comment on rumours of an impending critter strike.

3 comments:

SolidState said...

"I should have rolled a bunny"

lol :D

Very nice post :)

Graylo said...

LOLOL

Anonymous said...

That was a very funny post. "I should have rolled a bunny" May have to make that a signature.